Friday, December 5, 2014

Ways to Boost Your Self-Esteem Right Now


It’s time to give your self-esteem a boost and realize that YOU are a beautiful, unique, talented creation of life and belong in a life filled with love for yourself and those around you.

Here are ways to boost your self-esteem right now:

1. Compliment yourself.
The love you send into the world has to come from somewhere, right?  It comes from within you, and you’ve GOT to practice the self-love you deserve.  This is especially important when you’re giving your love to others.  One great way to give yourself love is through a practice called “mirror work” taught in depth by Louise Hay.  Walk right up to the mirror, and compliment yourself – it’s as simple as that.  It could be anything from “Your hair looks great today” to “I love the authentic, beautiful, unique person you are!”

2. Stop comparing yourself to others.
You are your own unique piece of the Universe.  Our world is one big jigsaw puzzle full of pieces that fit together in many ways, but you are only one piece, and must play your unique part.  When you compare yourself to others, you are undervaluing who you truly are. Realize your true self-worth.  It may even help improve your net worth!

3. Smile more often every day.
Smiling is essential to happiness and improved self-esteem. Studies show that smiling more (even if forced) can genuinely decrease stress, and also has many other benefits.  Not only will your mood rise, you’ll do the same for others; remember, as we empower ourselves and smile more, we shine a light for others to follow. They will also give themselves permission to smile more.

Even if for no other reason than the fact that you are still here, smile!

4. Be gentle to yourself.
Be gentle with yourself – you can’t change where you are right now, you can only change your perspective on it to shift yourself into a different, and hopefully more positive place in the future.  Also remember to be kind to others – what you say to others you simply say to yourself.  Go into every situation with the mission of improving others’ day through kindness and compassion, and you’ll see that the energy is returned exponentially.

5. Focus on how far you’ve come, not how far you have to go.
There’s no known force in this world that can move an entire mountain without breaking it down into pieces first.  Nonetheless, it’s the pieces that you’ve moved that remind you how far you’ve come.  The finish line will always be there waiting for you to cross it, just take a deep breath and keep going.

6. Reach out and get support.
Having positive relationships with open channels of communication is healthy and needed for positive progress. A strong network, whether it be through your local community, family, friends, online, etc., will hold you accountable to your own health & well being.  It will provide you with true and caring people  you can count on if life takes a negative shift.  (Don’t forget about the awesome Power of Positivity community that will shine for you every day! )

7. Look for special things that make your day.
    Look for something that makes your day every day, and soon enough, every day will be filled with things that make your day. – Kristen Butler

Acknowledge the things that make your day. Whether that’s thanking someone verbally or thanking God. Allow gratitude for all of the positive in your life to fill your spirit and nourish your body with  energy and love.

8. Eat healthy, organic. whole foods.
Eating healthy foods has multiple benefits including better health, better moods, and a happier digestive system that will thank you for eating this way.  You’ll even be seeing more favorable numbers on the scale!  So get that special dinner outfit out of the closet and hang it on the wall for motivation – you’re on your way!

9. Stay active every day.
Much like the way the laws of inertia work, activity is required if you want to stay on top of your game. Physical, mental, and even spiritual activity all count – for flowing water is filled with vibrancy and life while stagnant water is the opposite.  You can exercise, do yoga, use apps for self-development, meditate, or even just read a few chapters of your favorite book to stay active.

10. Do what makes you happy and follow your passion.
Life loves when we are passionate because we’re in our happiest and most creative state. Passion with the right action leads to creation that exceeds our expectations.  When we follow our passion and it truly feels right in our heart and mind we can always be assured we’re on the right path. It’s not always perfect or easy, but it is worth it.

Getting the right amount of quality sleep

Ways to Get Peaceful Sleep (No Matter How Stressed You Are)


There’s a little more to a good night’s sleep than simply thinking positive to go deep into a relaxing slumber. Choosing to control your conscious thoughts, habits, and environment can create many benefits to help you sleep better. Here are 10 ways to have a peaceful night’s sleep, regardless of how stressed you may be:

1. Spray lavender essential oil on pillow or use it in the room (aromatherapy)

If you’ve ever been to a Spa, you probably noticed that there were plenty of aromatic candles in the rooms. Aromatherapy has been known to stimulate the olfactory and limbic systems in your body, helping relax your emotional state and recall positive thoughts and feelings.

You can replicate this process by simply spraying lavender essential oil on your pillow. The calming and soothing fragrance of lavender will relaxed you, and ultimately help you to sleep easier and better.

2. Practice yoga

Yoga is a very good way to achieve a great night of sleep. It’s perfect after a challenging day at work, or when you feel that if you’ve worked quite hard but still have plenty of unspent energy. Many thoughts and potential worries from the day can keep you up at night.

Take a 30 minute trip to the gym, or simply lay down the yoga mat and posture your way through a few asanas into corpse pose for at least 2 minutes. You will be surprised at just how relaxing your sleep will be

3. Get out into nature and fresh air a few hours before bed

Many retreat locations are set nature to cleanse and rejuvenate your mind, body and spirit. Luckily however, you don’t have to buy a getaway to get away from the tension and stress build up inside of you. You can receive the same energy from nature by simply walking in the park or having a quick run in the woods. If you don’t have access to a park, your backyard has plenty of fresh air so get out there a few hours before sleeping. It really is a great aid in giving you a restful night’s sleep.

4. Take a warm, relaxing bath or shower

A little combo of Epsom salts and lavender oil in a warm bath goes a long way in helping the body relax. The warm water opens up the pores to let the positive elements of the water, salt, and lavender be absorbed by the skin. This will bring you to a more calm and relaxed state.

5. Write a gratitude list before bed

Sit down for a few minutes before bed and record what you’ve been grateful for during that day or the week so far. You will be surprised to find that as you go, you have quite a lot to write about; and in your effort of listing them all, your eyes can start to feel heavy and induce a nice restful sleep full of positive thoughts.

6. Skip the caffeine at least 6 hours before bedtime

It takes the body roughly 6 hours to flush out caffeine. Therefore, try to skip the caffeine for at least that long before you plan on going to bed. Caffeine can block the sleep inducing adenosine chemical that helps us sleep. Depending on your tolerance leve, you may not be affected, but most of us find it difficult to sleep after having our favorite cup hours before bedtime.

7. Create the right room temperature

Some of us take this for granted but keeping the right temperature before bedtime is really important in achieving a restful sleep. Find a temperature that is perfect for your unique needs where you can rest peacefully without sweating or shivering. You’ll find that you wake up less, and feel more refreshed in the morning.

8. Turn off TV and tech

Aside from getting you to keep tracking your friend’s whereabouts or activities, the light from electronics interferes with the body’s natural production of melatonin – the hormone that aids in opening up the pineal gland and helping you sleep.

9. Create a “normal” sleep schedule

The body clock sends signals to the body to rest, so having a “regular” sleep schedule helps a lot in achieving a restful night. Whether you have standard daylight hours, or work the midnight shift, the one important thing to remember is that you don’t want to burn both ends of the candle.

Fit the hours you need for sleep into your daily schedule and keep it consistent.

10. Fill your mind with something other than worries and fears

As you rest, negative thoughts can fill your mind, begin to brew, and rob you of your rest. This can keep you awake and maybe even make you upset and unable to sleep at all. When this happens, step away from your inner self and realize the negative thought process taking place. Divert the attention of your thoughts by looking out at the stars or making positive affirmation statements about a peaceful sleep. Something as simple as “I am grateful for hours of undisturbed, refreshing rest.” can help you make great strides in getting the sleep you desire.

Ways to Overcome Seasonal Depression



Take Vitamin D Tablets

Many doctors believe that the lack of Vitamin D not only helps contribute to seasonal depression, but can actually make it worse.

Vitamin D naturally occurs in sunlight, but in the winter months, people typically spend less time outdoors.  Therefore, taking a Vitamin D supplement can be crucial to keeping a positive mood. You can also get Vitamin D in certain foods, such as portabella mushrooms. Just by eating 100g of these types of mushrooms, you will get 74% of the recommended daily value of Vitamin D.

Make sure to stock up on some supplements before the winter months hit so you can keep your spirits high even on the coldest days.

Spend Time in Nature

Just because the sun goes into hiding, doesn’t mean your happiness has to!

Even if it’s cold outside, the sun still shines everyday, which means you can still get out to enjoy the beauty and positive energy of nature. Spending just thirty minutes a day outdoors has been proven to boost people’s moods and give them a sense of calm and peace. Nature keeps us grounded and even heals our minds and bodies.  Even if you have to bundle up with three jackets and a couple leg warmers, you will still benefit greatly from a short walk in nature.

As tempting as it may be, don’t go into hibernation in the winter.  Keep doing outdoor activities you enjoy, such as walking, biking, skating, hiking, or running. There’s nothing like getting back to nature to disconnect from the social realm, and reconnect with the Earth and everything around you.

Practice Daily Affirmations

Your mind is very powerful, and your thoughts can determine what type of day, week, or even year you will have. By instilling positive thoughts into your mind, you will soon start believing them. By believing them, you will then become your thoughts, which become your reality. A good day starts with good thoughts. So, next time you feel depressed, just write down one of your favorite positive quotes, and stick it on your mirror or somewhere you will see it easily.

You can even keep a daily positive affirmations journal and/or have some quiet meditation time each day where you remind yourself of these positive thoughts. Most people forget about their own healing power when looking for a remedy for seasonal depression. Don’t discount your own ability to heal yourself; people do it everyday through the power of positive thoughts, and you can easily start your own practice of using daily affirmations to keep a positive mindset throughout winter.

To start, just wake up with the thought that your day will be amazing, and that you are an amazing person. Once you tell yourself this enough, you will start to believe it and then be it! Repeat these affirmations in the mirror, with one hand on your heart and the other on your throat.

Everyone should develop some sort of positive habit such as affirmations – our own thoughts can truly be the best medicine.

Get Socialdepression

Many people suffering from seasonal depression don’t spend enough time with family or friends and isolate themselves from the outside world. While it might be hard to battle the voice in your head telling you to stay inside and forget about everyone else, spending a little time with others each day can help fight off depression.

We are social creatures, after all, and function best when we spend some quality time with others each day. Try to get people together to do something you love, such as ice skating, crafts, shopping, or something else interactive and fun. Having a group of people over to bake holiday treats or watch Christmas movies is another good idea, because you can still stay cozy at home while enjoying the company of others.

As much as you might want to stay huddled up in bed with coffee and Netflix, try thinking of ways to include others in activities that you enjoy as well. Just because the sun isn’t shining as much, doesn’t mean your inner light can’t shine! Others will also appreciate your efforts to organize a fun time that brings people together.

Do Volunteer Work

The best gifts, especially the ones during the holidays, aren’t always the ones you get, but the ones you give. The winter months are a great time to volunteer for a local soup kitchen or homeless shelter.  During the colder months, more people need a place to stay to shield themselves from harsh conditions in the winter. Giving back to the community not only makes others happy, but will make you happy as well because you’re adding value to others’ lives. Giving back to the community also puts an emphasis on helping others first.   Many people suffering from seasonal depression can feel trapped in their own minds, and volunteering can take the attention off of your thoughts for awhile and onto something else that brings a sense of purpose. Volunteering may open up some new doors for your career as well. Seeing how many people are happy because of your actions might even inspire you to start your own non-profit business.

No matter what happens as a result of you choosing to volunteer your time for people in need, you will, at the very least, feel better than you did just sitting around the house. A key to keeping your spirits up in the cold winter months is staying active and doing things you enjoy. You could even start volunteering regularly after work, which will give you the opportunity to stay social and make new friends.

Natural Ways to Boost Your Immune System and Eliminate Sickness



Simple Ways to Supercharge Your Immune System

1. Eat a Healthy Diet

Eating a balanced diet with adequate carbohydrates, proteins, and healthy fats keeps the immune system running well and helps ward off sickness. As Hippocrates said, “Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food.” Many people rely on over-the-counter medicines to keep them healthy through the winter months, but eating a diet rich in fiber and whole foods can be much more effective in preventing illnesses. According to Dr. Mercola, “most people, including many physicians, do not realize that 80 percent of your immune system is located in your digestive system, making a healthy gut a major focal point if you want to maintain optimal health.

Remember, a robust immune system is your number one defense system against ALL disease.” By eating healthy, you can throw away the antibiotics and boost your immune system naturally.

2. Get Plenty of Rest

The body is an incredible machine that helps you accomplish goals, digest your food, and do your job each day. With everything the body does for you, it needs time to rejuvenate and rest to get ready for the next day. Your cells actually repair themselves and regenerate during sleep, which is why getting at least seven hours of sleep a night is vital to keeping your immune system healthy. Getting adequate sleep helps your immune system fight off illnesses because your body produces hormones while you sleep, such as melatonin, growth hormones, and prolactin, all of which your body needs sufficient amounts of to function properly. Sleep heals, so make sure you’re getting enough each night to support a healthy immune system.

3. Exercise


Exercise provides a bevy of benefits, such as regulating hormones, balancing brain chemistry, controlling appetite, and promoting a better night’s sleep, but did you know it also can help you fight off colds? Studies show that exercising at least thirty minutes a day for five days each week can boost your immune system tremendously and keep colds at bay. If it’s too cold for you to workout outdoors, you could do at-home workouts or go to a nearby gym. Working out might at first seem like a chore, but staying active can help prevent colds and flus and keep you feeling great throughout the colder months of the year.

4. Get Plenty of Vitamin C

Vitamin C is known to help prevent colds and allergies, and help your body heal if you already have a cold. Vitamin C helps repair and regenerate tissues, helps support a healthy immune system, and acts as a natural antioxidant. The best way to get Vitamin C in your diet is by eating plenty of oranges, tomatoes, red and green peppers, cantaloupe, broccoli, and red cabbage. Drinking just one 8 ounce cup of orange juice a day can help boost your immune system tremendously and combat the common cold.

5. Drink Water, Water, and More Water

Most people don’t drink near enough water each day, which can be detrimental to maintaining good health. Doctors recommend drinking at least eight 8-oz glasses a day for most adults, because water helps your body perform many necessary functions, including cleaning out toxins, providing oxygen to your blood, circulating white blood cells and nutrients to the tissues in your body, aiding in digestion, and keeping your brain chemistry balanced. Since our bodies are made up of anywhere between 50-75% water, we need to keep hydrated to keep all of our body’s functions performing optimally.


6. Drink Herbal Tea


One of the most common ways to treat the common cold and flu is to drink hot herbal tea. The heat is soothing on a sore throat, and the herbs in the tea can help your body get rid of the virus faster. The herbs and roots most effective at fighting off colds and flus are thyme, licorice root, Echinacea root, elderberry, and St. John’s wort. When looking for herbal tea, try to find some that include these herbs, or take a separate supplement if you need to.

7. Oil of Oregano

Oregano contains a slew of essential vitamins and minerals such as Vitamins A, C, E, and K, as well as fiber, folate, iron, calcium, potassium, magnesium, and Vitamin B6. Oregano provides many benefits to the body, such as antioxidants to support a healthy immune system, anti-inflammatory properties, and is useful for treating upper respiratory infections. To use the oil, simply put a couple drops in a pot of steaming water and inhale the steam, or put a few drops in an 8 ounce glass of water. Only do this once a day though, as it is very strong. Pregnant women are advised not to use oil of oregano.

8. Apple Cider Vinegar

Drinking a tablespoon of apple cider vinegar each day helps to create an alkaline environment in the body, which keeps your immune system functioning properly and allows the body to fight off colds easier. If the vinegar is too strong by itself, add it to a glass of water or tea. You can use it as a preventative practice, or use it at the first sign of illness and repeat until symptoms subside.

9. Neti Pot


A neti pot is widely used to treat colds, and happens to be a very effective way to clear the nasal passages. A neti pot looks like a cross between a tea pot and a genie’s magic lamp, and uses a mixture of water and saline to clear the nasal passages. To use it, simply boil some water and add it to the neti pot, and either mix in saline solution or a teaspoon of salt for every two cups of water used. Shake the pot gently to mix the solution, and then lean your head forward and to the side over a sink. Insert the spout of the neti pot in one nostril, allowing the liquid to come out your other nostril. Repeat these steps for the other nostril. Then, blow your nose. You should instantly feel your sinuses clear up, and you can do this each day for as long as your symptoms persist.

10. Eat Foods Rich in Zinc

Finally, zinc plays an important role in immune system health and restoring and repairing cells. Many people are deficient in this vital mineral, but you can easily obtain it through certain foods. Legumes, green beans, brussel sprouts, corn, berries, and dates contain a fair amount of zinc per serving, and the added fiber is beneficial to maintaining health as well. Zinc blocks viruses from gaining full access to our cells, and keeps the immune system balanced. You can also take a zinc tablet as well to get the required amount in your diet.

Ways to Beat Holiday Stress

 
Holidays are a time to gather with friends and family to enjoy the festivities the season brings. Everyone seems to look forward to the holidays, the time off of school and work, and even coziness with movies by a fire.

However, the holiday season can also be a huge source of stress…

To prepare presents, host parties, bake goodies, have family stay over, and decorate, the stress can easily add up.  This can make the holidays seem like more a chore than a celebration. If this sounds like you during the holidays, try to implement these tips into your daily routine this season.  You’ll feel less overburdened with stress, and can embrace more of the true joy the holiday season brings.
Here are 4 Ways to Handle Holiday Stressholiday-stress
Don’t take on more than you can handle.

If your family expects you to host the holiday gatherings this year, but you don’t think you can manage, don’t be afraid to speak up and ask if they might be able to host instead. You might have other obligations, or simply not have time to get the house ready for a big party.  There’s nothing wrong with asking someone else in the family to host. You could always offer to bring more snacks or decorations to help them get everything ready for guests; that way, you can still make an important contribution without feeling overwhelmed.

Prioritizing tasks can also help you keep stress levels under control. Many people pack way too much into their days, often producing mounting stress.  If you have to, make a physical list of everything you need to get done.  According to a Harvard study, writing down your goals can dramatically improve your chances for success.

Make sure your “To Done” List (as we like to call it) only includes a few key tasks you need to complete each day. It’s much easier to manage stress when you’re reasonable with what you can accomplish within a specific time-frame.

If you can’t get something done that day, move it to the next day, or even ask someone for help -it’s OK!

Do something fun each day.

The holidays don’t have to be all work and no play.  Even if you have a lot to do, you can still set aside a little time each day to step away from the chaos of the holidays and nourish your spirit with people and activities that makes your heart happy.  After a certain time, set an agreement with yourself to stop what you’re doing and take time for you.   You’ll get everything done that you need to at the right time.

If you can’t get any alone time, spend time with family and friends doing something that doesn’t involve preparation and effort. Play a board game, watch movies, go eat at your favorite restaurant, or something your group can enjoy together.

Leading up to major holidays, you might feel strapped for time and rush to finish cooking and wrapping presents at the last minute.
 
Keep healthy eating habits.

During the holidays, it can be tempting to indulge in treats more often than you should, but think of how you will likely feel after the holidays are over. Make a pact with yourself to keep up your normal eating habits throughout the holidays, with some “cheat meals” sprinkled in here and there. Of course, many folks enjoy it, and eat what they want in celebration of the holidays, but it’s easy to let a couple days of treating yourself turn into a few more days, then weeks, then months.

To make sure you stay on track, start a healthy holiday eating challenge with friends, so you can hold each other accountable and also have workout buddies to rely on. The holidays can be a prime time for putting on pounds, and weight gain can often be a trigger for stress in a person’s life.

And if you love desserts, (who doesn’t?) try making them lower-fat by using applesauce instead of oil. This way, you can still enjoy your favorite foods without worrying about how your jeans will fit the next day. Making delicious food that everyone enjoys is an important part of the holiday season.  When you feed your body well, you will feel good, leaving less room for stress to creep into your life.

Embrace whatever happens.

Even if you go to the ends of the Earth to make sure something turns out perfectly, it may not always go as planned. Sometimes, you just have to embrace what’s going on in life and make the best of it.

You might put a pie in the oven while you go put the baby down for a nap or take a shower, and before you know it, the pie gets a little too brown on top. Or, you might go out shopping, expecting to find all your gifts in one day, but only come out with a few. Thinking about what could have happened is futile.  The moment has already happened – now you get to create new things in this moment.

There’s always a new day, so don’t stress too much if things don’t go as planned. You may even come to discover that the pie burned because someone else in your family already made the exact same one to bring later, and maybe you didn’t find all your presents because the store you go to the next day will have the perfect gifts for everyone on your list. Whatever happens this holiday, embrace it.  Love it or learn from it.

Keeping calm during the holidays and choosing not to worry about the little things can make a big difference in how much stress you put yourself under. Worrying about something doesn’t solve the problem; it only creates more to worry about. Remember this the next time you find yourself in a stressful situation, and remember – you control your reality. You only feel stressed if you choose to, so choose positively!

Your Brain For Powerful Life Changes



People nowadays take less vacation, work longer days, and retire at a later age. As a result, our brains are stressed and pushed to extreme limits – even unhealthy limits. In short, many of our lives are difficult.

So what can we do about this culture that’s been ingrained into the fabric of our society? Perhaps the best – maybe even the simplest­ – thing to do is to change our brains. If we can change our brains, we can change our lives!

I know – you are probably thinking that this sounds hard. Well, it’s not easy but it’s not impossible, either. And it’s certainly easier than trying to change the way our society works.
Use these tips to rewire your brain for powerful life changes.

1: Embrace a Positive Lifestyle
Despite of the difficulties facing our daily lives, we can indeed embrace a lifestyle of positive thinking and positive habits. Turning negative habits into positive ones requires both resilience and time management.

There are many different ways in which you can embrace a more positive lifestyle – practice affirmations, express gratitude, place inspirational material (such a quotes, religious scripture, etc.) around you, read uplifting books, meditation, exercise… just find something that helps you unwind and enjoy life. And most importantly – keep doing these things.

Embracing the positive will change your brain little by little.

2: Monitor Your Self Talk

Self-talk is that continuous stream of thoughts that run through your brain every day. These thoughts can be positive, negative, or neutral. Please understand this concept: if your thoughts are continuously negative, you are going to become a pessimist. If your thoughts are positive, you are going to be an optimist. Optimism = happiness + success!

Again, what you think you become. We cannot continuously have negative thoughts and expect live a positive life.


3: Take time to visualize your goals and aspirations
Jack Canfield, the world-renowned author of “Chicken Soup for the Soul” and one of world’s foremost authorities on success, states that the daily practice of visualizing your dreams as already complete can drastically quicken your realization of your dreams, goals and ambitions.

Visualization is a remarkably simple practice: just sit in a comfortable position, close your eyes and image your goals and aspirations as already completed. Look through your own eyes as to what you would see, feel, and hear if you met these goals and aspirations.

And you only need a few minutes each day. Visualize when you first awake, after meditation or supplication, or at another time when you are the most relaxed.

4: Take action that supports your goals.
By following the first four brain tips, you should be ready to take some action! You’re embracing a positive lifestyle, watching your self-talk and visualizing your goals. Good for you!

And here’s a promise: if you take action on your goals and aspirations, your life is going to become easier and more fulfilling. You’ll probably discover that the challenge lies in staying consistent and motivated. Know that everyone feels these things, and some people drive on and make their dreams a reality, anyways!

You’re here reading this article, so you already have the determination and drive. Take action and keep going!

5: Know your purpose
It may sound cliché, but life is too short to live it for someone or something else. Taking ones purpose for granted or setting it aside because of demands placed on us is wasteful and unfulfilling. After all, this is your happiness that we are talking about!

When your brain clearly understands your purpose in this lifetime, it reverberates through your entire being. The big secret is to finding your purpose.

Ask yourself two simple questions: (1) Do you know what you love doing, or can you find out? and (2) Can you make an impact doing what you love?

6: Know that your brain can be changed
‘Neuroplasticity’ is an actual medical term that refers to the brain’s amazing ability to form new neural connections throughout life. That’s right – your brain can literally grow through your own conscious efforts.

A wonderful book on this is called “Change Your Brain, Change Your Life” by Dr. Daniel Amen, one of the world’s most prominent and sought-after psychiatrists in the world, whom Dr. Mehmet Oz (“Dr. Oz”) calls “One of the most gifted minds in medicine.”

Dr. Amen writes comprehensively on the fact if you make a conscious decision to make changes in your life, no matter how big or how small, you can willfully make it happen.

7: Know that anything is possible
We’ve walked on the moon, created electricity, discovered flight, mapped the human genome, mass produced automobiles… all through the power of our brain. And here’s the thing… the only person who believed it was possible was the mind that first conceived it.

Your brain is an absolutely amazing gift, and you have something incredible waiting to be discovered. Maintain a positive attitude, create positive energy, and your brain will do the rest.

    “The mind is everything. What you think you become.” – Buddha

Fall in Love: How to Tell If It’s LOVE. . .

Sometimes our heart and mind get so caught up that it’s hard to tell the difference. In the moment, we feel so amazing that sometimes we just don’t care. But, it’s important to be careful. A broken heart can be devastating. Especially if you allow yourself to fall in love with the wrong person (in that case check out Karen Salmansohn’s book “Prince Harming Syndrome“). Or, if you develop strong feelings for someone who doesn’t desire the same level of commitment.

Any and all situations can arise, but we specifically want to help you determine if it’s truly love or just lust.



fall-in-love

First, it’s important to know exactly what both are and what they aren’t.

Real, true, unconditional LOVE is an intense feeling of affection – it’s fondness, warmth, attachment and endearment in the most intense and powerful way.  True love forms a strong emotional attachment. It withstands troubles, problems, imperfections and upset.

Lust is simply a very strong sexual desire. Lust revolves completely around attraction and sex. While lust is needed for love, love is not needed for lust. It can feel very powerful and usually it does. ;)  But, it cannot withstand time. It’s not unconditional and it will fade.

This may contribute to today’s divorce rate. You’ve got to be careful not to allow lust to dominate the relationship when love is truly the driving force for a beautiful, lasting relationship.

To fall in love, you must be willing to accept that person at their very best and worst. You get to know them fully and see them for who they truly are. You learn about their past and talk about their aspirations for the future. If together you see yourself as a perfect fit and can truly visualize your life together, you may be falling in love.

When you truly fall in love, it’s mutual. You are both head over heels for each other. Falling in love doesn’t mean your life will always be easy. Because, truthfully, it can get tough. But, you can be tough together (trust me you’ll need to be).
You know you’re in love when you. . .

– Fall in LOVE with someone who absolutely adores YOU – who cherishes you fully and embraces your imperfections.

– Fall in LOVE with someone you can’t stop thinking about. ;)

– Fall in LOVE with someone who you love with your whole heart.

– Fall in LOVE with someone that you think is absolutely, all-over-the-place SEXY – mind, body & soul!

– Fall in LOVE with someone who cares about your happiness and listens openly about your feelings.

– Fall in LOVE with someone you admire and who admires you.

– Fall in LOVE with someone that finishes your sentences and compliments who you are.

– Fall in LOVE with someone who makes you feel like you’re the most amazing person in the whole world.

– Fall in LOVE with someone who has strengths in areas that you need improvement. Many of the best relationships are people who are complete opposites.

– Fall in LOVE with someone who you get lost in conversation with (for hours at a time)!

– Fall in LOVE with someone who makes you want to be a better person and can help you do that.

– Fall in LOVE with someone who WANTS to meet your closest friends and family, and then accepts you even after that (haha).

– Fall in LOVE with someone who you hold a deep romantic passion for. In fact, they are the only one you desire!

The TRUTH is when you fall in love, you aren’t choosing lust or love. You are creating a balance of the two. Both are needed for a successful, long lasting relationship. Cheers to you and your relationship success

Signs You’re in the Right Relationship

Many people believe that we don’t choose our partners, and destiny puts us together. Whether that is true or not, it’s important to know if you’re in a healthy relationship.


So, how do you know if you’re in the right relationship?

Here are our tips to help you understand if you’re in the “right relationship” or understand and correctly steer your “wrong relationship”.
Telling Signs You’re in the Right Relationship

1. Communication is kind, open and honest.You know you’re in the right relationship when your words towards each other are kind and loving (more often than not). Of course, you’ll have your ups and downs, but if kind communication is consistent you have a winning formula.

Of course, not only do you want to speak kindly to each other, but also open and honest. In the right relationship, you can tell your partner ANYTHING without being judged or criticized. Likewise, you can be honest and expect understanding and love. If you feel like you cannot be open and honest, that’s a problem.

Likewise, you want to be sure you are receiving the open and honest truth from your partner. The truth is, we humans aren’t always perfect. So, if you catch your partner in a little white lie, don’t immediately send them off with packed bags.  Forgive, and encourage the importance of honesty. You deserve nothing less than kind, open and honest communication, so be sure that’s a cornerstone in your relationship.

2. You and your partner understand exactly how to make the other feel truly loved.
We all have different preferences when it comes to receiving love. In the right relationship, both partners understand the others needs and want to care for them in the best way possible.  From as small as a cup of coffee in the morning or a warm dinner at night, to a romantic mountain getaway for your anniversary, the right partner knows exactly what makes your heart swoon.

This is effectively done through the right communication. You don’t expect the other to read your mind. You learn, get to know your partner and act in a way that makes them fall in love with you even more.

3. You keep conflict and fights “on the down low”.
Conflict in any relationship is expected. No matter how perfect you are for each other, you will not agree on everything. Disagreements are natural and healthy, because you are speaking your mind and standing up for yourself.   It’s better to talk and find out how the other feels than to hide it and let it creep out even uglier later.

The key to disagreements is to listen without defending and speak without offending.  You want to keep fighting at bay and just between you two. When you call up a close friend or family member and get them involved that is childish and inappropriate. The key to a happy, healthy relationship is to talk about your disagreements and if you have to, agree to disagree.

If you plan on staying together for a long time, you’ll have to master this tip. If you don’t, you may have many more battles ahead of you (or worse an end to your relationship).

4. Your trusted friends and family approve.
Your close friends and family know you better than you know your self sometimes. When you fall in love, you may forget to take your brain with you. It’s easy to fall in love, especially if your partners got those smooth moves. ;) The people who care about you have opinions that matter. If the consensus is positive about your relationship, GREAT.

If it’s not. . . ask questions. Find out “Why?”

Contrary to your young rebellious beliefs, their opinion matters. It doesn’t mean to do what they say. Sometimes other people have opinions with their own motives behind them. But, it’s important to look for truth in what they are saying.

5. There is a healthy blend of time together (and time apart).
When you fall in love, you may want to do nothing but be wrapped up like John Lennon and Yoko Ono, not leaving each other for days on end.  But when you have time apart, it gives you insight into how valuable your relationship really is.  Seeing someone after time apart yields an extra special feeling that can not be replicated.

It’s also a great way for each of you to do something you love, that the other may not take much of an interest to. Understand the right balance and keep it going. This blend is different for each couple.  Find your own that works for the both of you.

6.  You see service above self.
In the right relationship, it’s important for you to be happy, but there’s nothing wrong with going the extra mile to outwardly show your love for your significant other.

Now I’m not talking about abandoning self-care or waiting on them hand over foot, I’m talking about making them feel warm and fuzzy inside.  Not only will the right partner appreciate the show of grace, but they will want to do the same for you.

Ways to Effectively Deal With Criticism


Living a life that others accept or want for you is limiting your birth right of FREE WILL.  It’s not their life. It’s yours. Make the most of it! :)

Not everyone will understand your journey. That’s okay. It’s not their journey. It’s yours. Embrace your freedom. Your true purpose is not to be here to please others. Life is about embracing who you are and following where your passions and desires lead!

If you live to serve others to avoid judgement and criticism – doing what makes them happy –  you will become very unhappy. That unhappiness will lead to depression. It’s a sign that you are putting off what your soul yearns for you to do. You limit your full potential and disconnect yourself from your true self. Advice is great, but most people (even close loved ones) don’t understand your journey. So, the only person who truly knows what is best for you is… well… you!

Anyway, in most cases, others opinion and criticism is not about you, it’s about them.  It’s coming from their limited perspective, worries and fears. Instead of taking their judgement personal or getting into an argument, there are many positive action steps you can take to move forward.
Here’s our Ways to Effectively Deal with Criticism:

1. Take a deep breath (or a few).
The best thing to do is to not react right away. Take a deep breath, or a few, if you need. There’s actually a very good reason for this. When we feel attacked, we sometimes go into a fight or flight mode. Taking a deep breath allows oxygen to continue, it lowers our heart rate, and it allows for our response to be more calm and reasonable.

If you immediately react, and feel threatened you are taking the defense. This brings unneeded stress to your body. Remind yourself that they are not you, they have not walked a day in your shoes and you are doing just fine. If there’s a bit of truth to what they are saying, consider it later when you have a clear mind. A perfect response would be, “Thanks. Let me take some time to think about that.”

If the the criticism is a borderline insult, don’t reply at all. Take a few deep breaths and just leave the conversation. You never want to react harshly and regret it later.

2. Don’t take it personal.
In most cases, criticism has very little to do with you and more to do with the person and their perspective of the world. If someone offends you, it’s usually because they feel that way about themselves or their abilities. They are advising you based on how they feel. If you highly respect and trust this person, the next tip will help you. If you don’t, then definitely don’t take it personal at all! Let it go in one ear and just as quickly out the other.

3. Look for the truth.
Remember, there is always a small degree of truth in everything. Statements that may feel like criticism can actually just be gentle, loving reminders. In fact, we may take a strong offense towards it because there is some truth in it and our Ego freaks out. Yep… that’s right! It seems crazy, but it’s true.
Allowing yourself to be open-minded to what you hear doesn’t mean you have to believe it or act upon it. It just means if you find something you can learn from, by all means do it! Sometimes others can help us see things that we cannot to grow and improve.

4. When the going gets tough, get TOUGHER!
Exactly! Even if you are a sensitive person, you’re going to have to toughen up and build a tolerance to criticism. It’s easy to be a critic, so most people are. It takes strength and courage to be who you truly are and live your own life.

You’ve got to get tough, because the truth is, you’ll meet critics your whole life. However, the good news is… the less attention you give to criticism, the less you’ll experience it.

The best “Get Tougher Tool” is self-esteem and a deep inner confidence. So, if you feel defeated when judgement and criticism arise focus and develop your own inner love and confidence. When you know who you are and why you are here, you’re unstoppable.

5. Always be true to yourself!This is the most important tip of them all – be true to yourself! Other people don’t have to understand your journey or even accept it. When you are true to yourself and who you are life is magical. Doors of opportunity open at every corner. Solutions are endless and life is fun and exciting.

Signs You May Be An Old Soul

Do you feel older than you really are?



You could be an old soul.

About 10% of the world’s population are made up of them – and if you aren’t an old soul yourself, you’ve most likely met one.  An old soul emanates warmth and enlightenment, using their wisdom and patience to teach the lessons that have been passed down through the ages.  They present themselves as special types of people in our world. They see through ancient eyes and understand through an ancient heart.

An old soul’s outlook on life is far different, and more mature than many others. They are vital to the evolution of our collective consciousness.  Old souls have experienced lifetime after lifetime, and have refined their inner wisdom through their dealings with Karma.  As a result, the old soul lives life internally, following a solitary path while illuminating a path for others at the same time.

If you’ve been told that you’re wise beyond your years, you may be an old soul, but if you’re not sure whether your soul is “old” or not, these 10 signs will tell you:


1.  You travel an independent path.
Because old souls are disinterested in the pursuits and interests of people in their age groups, they find it difficult to make friends with people they can’t relate to. This can turn into a potential problem, as an old soul may find themselves alone often. But, many old souls see the true value of their own company. This introverted nature doesn’t really come from a social preference or temperament – it’s simply a sign of having an old soul.

2. You thirst for knowledge, wisdom and truth.
The old soul is naturally attracted to intellect, wisdom, and philosophy.   To an old soul, frivolous, superficial lifestyles have little or no meaning or value,  for their own path toward enlightenment is actively sought out through wisdom, happiness, and truth.

3. You are spiritually inclined.
The old soul has been finely tuned into their intuition and greater guides.  This can have the effect of creating heightened senses both spiritually and emotionally as they realize their place in life.  An old soul prefers this life however, knowing that it is most fulfilling for them to pursue love, enlightenment and peace.

4. You didn’t “fit in” with children your age.
If you got along with adults as a child more than you did other children, you may very well be an old soul. An old soul isn’t as absorbed in the interests of others in their age group, and therefore find it more difficult to make friends with them, which can sometimes be problematic for them because they can feel like an outsider.

They are also often misunderstood by others.  For instance, adults may have just considered you to by shy or awkward with other children your age. However, your inquisitive, mature, and intelligent nature attracted you toward people older than you that display more intelligence and wisdom than those in your age group.

And if you are a parent of a child who responds better when around adults, you may come to realize that they too, are an old soul.

5. You reflect often on your inner thoughts and feelings.
Old souls have learned many lessons through their spirit cycle that they often take time to reflect on their actions and the actions of people around them.  This ability serves as a great teacher in their life, and in turn, makes them clearly perceptive of their surroundings.

    “The soul is placed in the body like a rough diamond, and must be polished, or the luster of it will never appear” – Daniel Defoe

6. You see the bigger picture.
Like a small cog in a big machine, old souls realize that they are a small, but integral part of life.  They see from a higher perspective when approaching life, realizing that they are one with all that is as they aim to align themselves, and their actions, with that of the highest good.  As troubles confront the old soul, they simply see each as a passing cloud that will only reveal the sun once more.  This helps lead them through life with a placid nature.

7. You act as a voice for humankind.
Old souls often act as a representative for mankind through their own creative expression.  They depict the mental activities of society through the liberal arts, giving a voice to the thoughts of culture as a whole.  Throughout history, many sages have connected us through a depiction of their visualization in the most creative ways.  The old soul finds fulfillment in this self-expression. Their creativity, knowledge and intuitive nature make an impact on those they meet and ripple through humankind.

8. You understand that life is short.
An old soul always finds itself being reminded of mortality, that this physical realm is only temporary. They make the most of each moment. Although this can drive the old soul into being withdrawn, the inner solitude and increasing detachment gives them clarity. They feel the inner desire to be a prophetic voice teaching others to respect and value their time.

9. You aren’t materialistic.
The old soul focuses more on the beauty and value that life naturally provides rather than the short lived joys of material posessions.  They respect Mother Earth and strive to get by with only what they need for fulfillment. For them, what nature provides is far more valuable than any social status, the latest trends or any unearthly matter.

10. You just “feel” old.
As you quietly walk your path seeking fulfillment, you may find yourself to have little energy compared to the younger souls around you.  Much like a person who is old in age, your old soul has already experienced a lot and is not excited by the trivial things in life. To an old soul, relaxing in a calm, quiet setting is about as good as it gets.

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